


Wait, are we dating the same girl?

by QueenEmpath



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: (attempted humour), (no actual cheating), Alternate Universe, F/M, insecure boyfriends, suspicion of cheeating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-05
Updated: 2017-01-05
Packaged: 2018-09-14 23:51:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9210686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenEmpath/pseuds/QueenEmpath
Summary: Dean and Seamus get the biggest shock of their lives.when they realise , they're dating the same girl. Are they really?





	

**Author's Note:**

> It's my first attempt to humour

 

Dean and Seamus have always competitive about things. Like who'd get more marks, who would get their Christmas present first, and who'd get better job. During the weekend, they were at their favourite place: The Three Broomsticks.

"So, Dean how's life going?" asked Seamus as if he didn't see him at work every day.

"Ah, what can I say?" said Dean with a grin. "I've a great job, a great life, and a pretty girl by my side..." said Dean nonchalantly.

The ending was news to Seamus. "You're telling me, that you, Dean Thomas, has got a girlfriend — who is actually beautiful, and not some troll under Polyjuice? No fucking way!" exclaimed Seamus.

"I knew you weren't going to believe me. That's why I got a proof," said Dean with a smug smile, pulling his Muggle phone out of his pocket. Muggle phone's had become quite popular in wizarding London. Dean brought up the picture and turned his phone around to show Seamus. The minute Seamus' eyes landed on the picture, his eyes widened.

"She can't be your girlfriend," said Seamus in a small voice.

Dean laughed. "You're only saying that because you're jealous," he said, grinning.

Seamus shook his head. "N — no that's not the reason. She can't be your girlfriend because she's mine," said Seamus.

Dean's eyes widened — then narrowed.

"You know, mate, that's not a good joke," said Dean, his tone the vocalisation of seriousness.

Seamus shook his head again. "I'm not joking," he said, shoving his phone into Dean's hand, who snatched the phone from his friend. Upon seeing the photo, he was devastated. In the picture, there was the exact same girl with tan skin, big brown eyes, and beautiful long black hair. She was sending flying kisses to Seamus.

"You know what this means?" asked Seamus.

This time, Dean shook his head. He was still in shock.

"We're dating the same girl!" exclaimed Seamus.

Dean shook his head in denial. "No this can't be true... There has to have been some sort of misunderstanding. Parvati couldn't cheat on me — not like this — not with my best mate," muttered Dean.

"Parvati? She told me her name was Padma and that she works in the Ministry," said Seamus.

"She told me she works in a boutique," said Dean, frowning.

"You know what, mate? We can't sit like this and let that girl play with our emotions. We've got to catch her red handed."

"But how?"

"First, we have to gather evidence about her two-timing. Then we'll set a trap," explained Seamus with a wicked, but determined smirk. "And Dean…. no sex," he added knowingly.

Dean choked on his drink. "W — what are you talking about? Nothing happened between us," said Dean defensively.

Seamus rolled his eyes. "Yeah right."

* * *

 

The next week, the two boys put their plan into action. They kept a close eye on their girlfriends — or rather, girlfriend!

On Friday, Parvati visited Dean. Though he felt like strangling her, he kept a fake smile on his face.

After dinner, Parvati went in Dean's bedroom and started to remove her clothes. Dean who came there on time, looked away from her inviting gaze.

"W — what the hell are you doing? Put some clothes on and go home," ordered Dean.

"What are you talking about? I was planning on staying — and why are looking in other direction as if you've never seen me naked before?" asked Parvati, irritated.

"My point is, I don't want see you without clothes. Just put them on and leave," said Dean coldly.

"What is your problem? Are you PMSing or something?" asked Parvati sarcastically. She didn't like how her boyfriend was behaving.

"Maybe I am," Dean shot back.

"You know what? Go to hell and don't come to me the next time you need someone to use," said Parvati.

She put on her clothes back on with a wave of her wand and left in anger. When Dean was sure she had actually left, he quickly texted Seamus.

_She left. I turned her down. I think she'll visit you.-DT_

After about an hour, he got reply from Seamus.

_She's here. She looked really pissed off. When I asked her what happened, she said she'd had a hard day.-SF_

_Alright. But don't sleep with her. No matter what.- DT_

_Never, mate, never. You know I could never do that to you. - SF_

"Seamus, put that phone away or I'll throw it out of the window. Who are you talking to anyway?" asked his girlfriend.

"Just a friend, babe," said Seamus, hurriedly. His girlfriend looked convinced and she nodded.

* * *

 

It had been one month since Seamus and Dean had been trying to catch their cheating, two-timing girlfriend. Their work was difficult as well.

Half of time, they were on Auror missions — and when they weren't, they were trying to get evidence against Parvati/Padma — whatever her real name was.

Finally, they decided to catch her red-handed. They told their girlfriend to meet them at Madam Puddifoot's cafe on the weekend.

On Saturday, Dean and Seamus were at Madam Puddifoot's waiting for the two-timing, cheating skank. Just then, the door of the café opened and in entered Parvati. She looked around before spotting Dean and Seamus.

"Oh Dean, I'm sorry for being late. By the way, who's this?" she asked, eyeing Seamus.

"Oh, so now you don't know who I am? I'm the guy you've been dating for the past four months, remember?" said Seamus, glaring daggers at Parvati, who was both embarrassed and dumbfounded.

"W — what, I never dated you, you creep. Dean, I swear he's lying; don't believe any of the bullshit he's saying about me," said Parvati, trying to convince Dean.

"So I'm lying? What about these?" said Seamus, pulling out his phone and showing her pictures of them.

Parvati looked at the photos and then glared at Seamus. "That's not me, you dumb arse. It's my twin, Padma."

"Your twin, yeah right. That's the stupidest excuse I've ever heard. Even Muggles wouldn't believe such a two Knut lie," said Dean.

"I can't believe you're actually believing what this asshole is saying!" exclaimed Parvati, offended.

"We have proof against you, you cheating , two-timing slut," barked Seamus. By now, other patrons of the café, including Madam Puddifoot, were staring at them.

"I swear, you call me a slut one more time, I'm going to hex both of your balls off," threatened Parvati.

"Say whatever you want say. It won't change the truth, slut," said Seamus mockingly.

That was it. Parvati drew her wand and pointed at Seamus; she was about to cast spell when the café door opened and in entered a girl. Everyone's eyes fell on the new visitor, forgetting about the ongoing fight.

To Dean and Seamus' horror, the girl looked exactly like Parvati. She quickly spotted Seamus and rushed to him.

"Oh Merlin, Seamus love I'm so, so, so sorry! There was an emergency at the Ministry. That's why I got late," she said in a rush.

Then she looked at Parvati and Dean.

"Oh, Parvati, what a pleasant surprise!" Turning to Dean, she said, "You must be Dean, Parvati's boyfriend. I've heard so much about you, but how do you know Seamus?" asked Padma.

"Ah, well, we're best mates you see," said Dean hesitantly, not daring to look at his own girlfriend who looked like an angry dragon. Seamus, on the other hand, was opening and closing his mouth like a fish.

"So it's a double date"? asked Padma, smiling.

"No it's not," spat Parvati.

"Parvati?"

"No, Padma, I'm not dating someone who doesn't have a pinch of trust in me, and who thought I cheated on him with his best mate, and who didn't even try to talk to me when he had those suspicions," said Parvati.

Padma looked at her sister and then at her boyfriend questioningly. Before Seamus could say anything, Parvati beat him to it.

"These two knuckleheads thought that we were the same person and we were two-timing them — and your boyfriend told me that he knows every inch of your body, which I didn't want to know," said Parvati looking at Seamus with disgust.

"Padma, I — " But before Seamus could say anything, Parvati stopped him.

"Enough of your shitty excuses. Neither me nor my sister need either of you." And with that Parvati dragged Padma away, leaving the two boys, who were staring at each other with pity, alone.

"We fucked up royally," groaned Dean.

"Yes, we did," said Seamus.

* * *

 

It took almost a month for the Patil sisters to forgive their respective boyfriends. Though Padma wasn't involved in the whole 'café humiliation scene', she forgave Seamus — but scolded him. For example, "Trust is the foundation of every relationship." and how "Communication is the most important thing between lovers."

Parvati, on the other hand, actually hexed Dean and warned him that if he ever did anything like that again, she'd definitely leave him. After (lots of) making up, everything went back to normal.

At work, Dean and Seamus were with their other Auror friends. Ron looked at the two of them and spoke: "Do you know what Fred and George did? They made Angelina and Katie believe that they were going out with the same guy under a different name. Isn't that hilarious?" asked Ron, chuckling. Whilst Harry and Neville were laughing, Seamus and Dean looked at each other in horror.

"No, it's definitely not!" they shouted in unison

**THE END**


End file.
